CHERYL COLE - HALF AS TALENTED, 10 TIMES AS HYPED

Cheryl Cole - Half as talented but 10 times as hyped....

SBUK's favorite writer Karen Annanina says nay


Half as talented, 10 times as hyped compared to WHOM, I hear you ask? Well, the person I had in mind is the almost-forgotten woman of British pop. Rachel Stevens.

When S Club 7 hit TV, she was the one all the boys (and a few um.... “others”) looked at. She had a gorgeous face with a smile like sunshine and beautiful eyes. She had a deliciously curvy physique that she showed off every week in figure-hugging clothes. She had the sweetest, most endearing personality.

And she had talent. She was good enough to share lead vocal duties with the ultra-talented Jo O’Meara, and contributed her own unique flavour with sweet, emotive vocals on songs like “Natural”, “Show me your colours” and the truly beautiful “I really miss you”. When Jo was forced out of action by a long-term back injury, Rachel took over lead vocals along with Bradley. After S Club, she had several hit singles and made two solo albums which were probably too experimental and quirky to be successful commercially, but they did receive many good reviews, especially for the quality of her vocals.

She could act. S Club starred in a whole sequence of children’s TV comedy-drama series called “Miami 7”, “LA 7” and “Hollywood 7”, where she was always a warm, funny, ditzy but adorable presence.

And she could dance. S Club or even her solo career could never provide her with the setting she required to show off the extent of her skills, but on the BBC TV series “Strictly Come Dancing” she achieved the highest number of straight “10” scores of any contestant ever, including series winners Alesha Dixon and Tom Chambers.

So beautiful, so loveable, so talented. But where is she now? Nowhere.

What we DO have is so-called “Queen” Cheryl Cole, now in the “Everybody Loves....” class formerly the sole preserve of Kylie Minogue.

By far the least talented of the girls who formed “Girls Aloud” out of “Popstars: The Rivals” her presence in the group and the absence of the hugely talented Javine was a travesty. Simon Cowell noted that she couldn’t sing, and to this day her voice never rises above a characterless and rather tuneless bleat. But she had was a nice set of dimples and twinkly brown eyes so the public loved her.

Her next claim to fame after dimpling her way into Girls Aloud was to be arrested, tried and found guilty of assault against a female toilet attendant. The judge noted that she showed no remorse for the assault and made no apology for the injuries she had caused.

A few years passed. In none of them did she manage to stand out in Girls Aloud. Then came a career-defining moment! Her husband, footballer Ashley Cole, was unfaithful to her. Overnight she became a tragic heroine, her tearstained face staring gloomily out of every tabloid and celeb mag. People began to notice her. The story of the dastardly betrayer and the brave, pretty little wife just went on..... and on..... and on.........

Then another career-defining moment! In a moment of inspiration that really does show the man’s genius, Simon Cowell picked her as one of the judges on mega-popular TV show “The X Factor”. Her kindness and caring nature towards “her” artists seemed genuine and was extremely touching. She seemed to be a lovely person and everybody loved her.

It would have been perfect if she had simply become the Nation’s Sweetheart for having a sweet heart. The media needs loveable characters. But, showbizbeing what it is, she couldn’t resist parlaying her popularity as an X Factor judge into grabbing herself some of that X Factor action and using her exposure there to launch a solo singing career.

Will it be the final polish on a precious gemstone or a layer of tarnish on what could have been solid gold? Loony, obsessed fans may be deceived by an Emperor’s New Clothes -style performance on X Factor and call it “amazing”, “fantastic” and so on, but on the online forums attached to tabloid papers and entertainment sites there were as many voices crying “Rubbish!” Does she want to risk her popularity by annoying people? “Too much of anything can make you sick” she sings, and it seems that some people have had too much already.

In truth it wasn’t “rubbish” but it was pretty ordinary. She may have been singing live (although many have alleged that she was not) but, if so, it merely showed that a full-length show featuring her voice would be a tedious test of an audience’s loyalty.

And I’ve read, with growing astonishment, claims by fans that she “danced her ass off” when all she did was hop from one foot to the other and dance for about 5 seconds at the end. Does this mean that her fans don’t expect much? Maybe Cheryl-worship is a satirical comment on fame and celebrity in the new ironic age?

If so, we get it. A supremely untalented, uncharismatic, uncurvy but definitely pretty and seemingly nice young lady can become a media darling if a few influential people wish it to be so. She can even become Queen of Showbiz in the UK. Just don’t suggest that it has anything to do with talent or it would be Rachel Stevens sitting there on that throne, not Cheryl Cole.

This post has been edited by Karen on Oct 27 2009, 01:10 AM

i heard the album. i dont really see what the fuss is about. shes throw away pop, nothing more. not that theres anything wrong with that....but shes not very good live, she doesnt stand out in any way. theres just not a lot there really. but whatever, its all harmless fun i guess. much like the group she came from.

as for s club 7. i was always surprised at how like able they were in their shows. cant say i liked that many of their songs though.

I was listening to their albums and was surprised at just how good they were! I'd forgotten all those little gems like "You're My Number One" and "Two In A Million" - songs I was singing along to the very first time I heard them! And Rachel's albums still sound really good to me.

Oh and thanks for not bashing me, Cubby. I was feeling really nervous and emotional when I came back to see if anyone had commented.

This post has been edited by Karen on Oct 27 2009, 07:33 AM

What an absolute waste of time that was. Why do you hate anyone being liked here?

lmaoz. k doll.

I heard Cheryl's album and it is pretty dire. There are 3 or 4 songs listenable, and I love the first single, but the rest is just repetitive and boring.
vocally she has such an incredibly small range. Her voice is quite weak too, so she only suits selected songs (eg. fight for this love).

her performance on x factor was good but she missed a few notes and at times it was painful, but she did a very good job still.

rachel stevens on the other hand, is no more talented than a fish. has she ever performed live?

an interesting read karen!

.....and this essay is coming from someone who can't handle the fact that everyone here thinks that Rachel from this year's X Factor is rubbish

POT IS CALLING KETTLE RIGHT ABOUT NOW.

I think we all know Cheryl's current popularity is down to her beauty and the hype around her. No one really thinks it's because of her immense singing talent. That doesn't stop us loving her and enjoying her music.

cruise tells it how it is.

<3 <3

I love how Cruise knows about Rachel! Are you following the X Factor this year Cruise??

When I get home from work YOU'RE DEAD!

LMFAO

YES! For the most part, I guess. I love X Factor!

I've been only watching performances from Danyl, Lucie, and Jamie.

OMG watch Stacey and Miss Frank as well!

Rachel isn't nowhere, she recently got married so she isn't working now that I know of but last year she won Strictly Come Dancing and was very popular on it. My brother is an active member on her forum! I guess the sparkle in her career faded out as it does for so many but she's liked enough that she can do other things now.

As for Cheryl, I'm pretty definite she was singing live, it certainly sounded like it and she sounded out of breath at some points. I liked it, she doesn't have the biggest voice in the world but neither does Britney and I love her voice. And she did more than just hop from one foot to another, what about Britney's performance last year? You'd defend the death out of that. I dunno why you bothered with this really, what is it's purpose?

LMFAO!!!!!

What Cruise and Daisy said.

DIVA CHERYL

Just came in to say that. I obvs didn't read it.

I watched that Miss Frank video (Whitney song) you posted and it was really good! One girl reminded me of old school Mutya

It's such a rubbish post Karen. If this isn't the end of you then I don't know WHAT IS.

Yes we know she can't sing very well. But personality is half the battle of being a popstar. And people find her loveable, warm and identifiable. You could go for a drink with Cheryl and find her to be "one of us". This is why no one likes Rachel (from X Factor). She's the complete opposite of Cheryl personality wise. She's got a voice. But nothing else.

And it's funny of you to bring up the toilet attendant fight, because I'm pretty sure when someone bring up a Britney misdemeanour from the past you're the first to defend it and blame it on "the media"

And Daisy had it BANG on about the differences between Cheryl's and Britney's X Factor PERFS. Cheryl wasn't HALF DEAD for a start!

You're just a massive contradiction.

This post has been edited by I Am... Michael Fierce on Oct 27 2009, 06:08 PM

She became a media darling because she has an opinion, she has charisma. She's not loved because the media told people to do so, the people loved her first and then the media followed. To compare her to Rachel Stevens is just ridiculous. Cheryl Cole would be saying "Lily Allen is a chick with a dick" while Rachel Stevens would be "Oooh nice handbag". The media lapped it up! There was no interest in Rachel. She was good, but boring.

No popstars success is down to talent. It's down to ambition, drive and most of all... LUCK!

You're just going to claim that your opinion is the right one anyway, so I don't know why I bother.

Maybe I should get some quotes from the producers she worked with (Taio Cruz and Will.I.Am) saying how good she sang their songs. You seem to use that sort of PR bullshit all the time about Britney so I assume you'll believe the same for these producers as well.

THIS.

YES! For the most part, I guess. I love X Factor!

I've been only watching performances from Danyl, Lucie, and Jamie.

And Rachel just to HATE I HOPE!

I HATE CHERYL BUT I HAVE TO SUPPORT MIKE. SORRY KAREN.

Get it Mike! I just wanna say too, how did Cheryl get to the final of Popstars at all if she can't sing?

This post has been edited by Daisy on Oct 27 2009, 08:16 PM