| Revereche |
Posted on Apr 19 2012, 06:23 AM |
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The story is a cliché, but the proper handling of it I've so long been waiting for - a full and constant exploration of the subject matter, which still keeps the dissolution believable. Excellent. Fucking four stars. The hell are my scissors *SCHPLUCK* |
| CarolineJohnson |
Posted on Apr 19 2012, 04:52 AM |
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Could you turn that large image of the dissected rat into a link? It's stretching the page to no end and I had a hard time reading the story because I couldn't figure out where the horizontal scroll bar went at first.
On topic, though, it's an interesting story. Kind of cliched though. I've read similar things in stories like Suicide Mouse and Mereana Mordegard Glesgorv. |
| The Outsider |
Posted on Feb 23 2012, 06:02 PM |
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Oh OK. |
| KDarkness |
Posted on Feb 23 2012, 12:50 PM |
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No. |
| The Outsider |
Posted on Feb 23 2012, 06:11 AM |
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Soooo is this the "post pictures of entrails" thread now?
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/comm...8/Cut_rat_2.jpg |
| Cosbydaf |
Posted on Feb 23 2012, 06:05 AM |
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Admittedly the whole "Horrible thing drives the protagonist insane ans he kills himself" thing is overdone, but I think this story was a good effort. |
| KDarkness |
Posted on Feb 23 2012, 03:48 AM |
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When the police find my body, they won't know what to think. |
| leesamfish |
Posted on Feb 23 2012, 03:46 AM |
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What if, you exploded, and then exploded again? |
| KDarkness |
Posted on Feb 23 2012, 03:42 AM |
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Yeah, the ending is the biggest problem for me. I really had no idea how to end it because I planned on something dark to happen, of course, but I really didn't know how to get around standard generic Creepypasta ending. Not to mention my writing gets weak near the end in general. |
| Tiki Snakes |
Posted on Feb 23 2012, 02:46 AM |
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I liked it. But if I'm honest, I think the ending is the weak point, rather than the strong point. It's okay, but it's not exactly unpredictable by that point. I think the buildup is good enough, involved enough, that it could support a lot more than that.
Everything up to the catbrick is gold, would be interesting to see the last section redone differently I think. |