Dear customer, we have the big privilege to announce that Ovum industries have returned after our long outer-dimensional-exile-caused absent, so long in fact that we don't have a clue what year it is, so from now will we referred to this year as year 0 A.T.R.O.O.I.T.H.T.S.P.T.I.W.B(after the return of ovum industries to hopefully the same place that it was before).
If this would be the first time you have heard from us because you have acquired this account from a electronic stationary/ portable device/implant gained with the help of a crude bartering system that the new chaotic environment have brought upon us or by stealing/looting/ wrestling it out of the cold dead hands of your neighbour, we welcome(and/or forgive) you to the Ovum family with open arms.
Or if the case is that you have never heard about us before caused by a wormhole sending us back in time/alternative dimension do we also welcome you with the mentioned before open arms and the reassurance that you will be yet another happy customer (because you probably already have/will be).
now you are probably confused and got a lot of questions, and since our last General question manager was destroyed by some litter critter from beyond our comprehension of time and space, we well try to answer them as good as we can.
Q-Will my favourite food/electronic/tool/ biological/ adult entertainment/firearm product return to the shelves soon?
A-In time, yes, but so far is only 25% of our facilities in working order with another 50% still not found and 24% being cleaned/repaired/exhumed and/or demolished, the ground upon where it once stood salted and everyone that once knew what was there in the first place taken care of.
Q-Will there be any other robots then the canvasser in the Mark I
A-Due to our absent have somehow this so called "line of biomecha" named series Z got a huger success, and even though we got another Mark I
ready for production will it have to wait until we have taken care of the Z series. permanently.
Q-What happened to my relative/friend/worst enemy/family heirloom that was employed at your facilities?
A-rest assured that the ovum worker pod
can withstand the crushing pressures of the deep sea, make sure the wearer survive suspended animation for a really long time and the internal reactor will technically never run out. but if the accident would be there and harm to the suit and/or the wearer will ocur, the suit will most likely try to regenerate the damaged tissue and get to safety and not that often cause the generator to go into meltdown and blow a quite impressive hole in the ground.
I hope that have put your worried mind to rest and that we will se you again for our next newsletter here from ovum industries and if you got any questions and want to send them in, you don't have to worry, we already know them and they will be considered for publication.
And remember, don't put all your eggs in one basket.
sincerely yours MRF area coordinator, temporary general question area coordinator.