Remember to breathe, Tagged ;; Scarlette

[Caroline]

Casimir sat down on the wooden bench and took a grand bite out of his crimson apple. Large bags lay under his eyes as he had hardly slept for the last 3 days. It seemed that the minute he had stepped into the school, he had been swallowed up my drama. It always rotated him, wherever he went. It was tormenting, yet at some moment he couldn’t help but be flattered. Nevertheless at the moment, he was exhausted and all he wanted to do it fall onto his bed and rest. Sleep and hibernate like the bears of the winter. At least he had had a shower; the filth had pealed off like a snake skin and he no longer smelt like airplane. But still, he was felt hollow and completely lifeless. He really needed to sleep properly, but he knew he couldn’t. Not just yet at least. He had lessons to attend to and work to give it and drama to take hold on. Now all he had to do is eat and get some life into him.

Taking another bite of his apple, he rested his elbow against the large oak wooden table, pressing his hand against his cheek. He was looking ahead in a dreamy, dazed way, his mind still half asleep. Occasionally, he took bites out of his apple, but apart from that he was in another drama-free, angst-free world. But he knew that this world was soon to be broken.

[scarlette]

A group of girls swanned into the crowded room, talking and laughing like the normal teenagers you see in films. At the centre walked Scarlette, looking much different from a few weeks before when she had been nothing but skin, bone and lots of tears. She looked happy now, and though she was still painfully frail looking, there was a glint in her eyes, a shine in her hair. It had taken her months, but she had finally moved on.
Even her ferret, Dorian seemed more animated. Scarlette couldn't quite remember what she had done with her top-hat, misplaced it she supposed, but as a result Dorian no longer had anywhere to sleep so he was currently cradled in her arms.
As they approached the cafeteria Scarlette caught sight of a dark shape out of the corner of her eye, solitary and bedraggled. She supposed it was just another emo-boy. She would have pointed him out to Mist who was just ahead of her in the queue, her sweet friend had quite a penchant for damaged people, but this particular one looked a bit worse for wear.
She turned to look at him once again, there was something very familiar about the way he sat, the shiny quality of his hair. But no, it couldn't be. She had come to the conclusion that he wasn't coming back. Besides, even if he did, it wouldn't be for her.
She turned away hurriedly and proceeded to strike up a conversation with one of the dinner ladies as she was served something that looked vaguely like rice.

[Caroline]

Putting his hand in his pocket, Casimir took out his zen and fiddled around until he found the right music. Sighing, he popped his earphones in and switched on the music, and was swallowed by it for only a few moments. Listening to 'Arcade Fire' was relieving, but it didn't halp. It just caused a larger head ache. Getting to his feet, he felt suddenly very hungry and looking down at the apple in his hand, the teenager smirked and got to his feet and walked down to the place where they served food. As he stood in line, he hardly looked up, always looking down at his zen. He was curious to see what type of music his friend had put on whilst he was in Montreal. He had not yet discovered.

He suddenly brusquely stopped however, as some pushed him. Clearly, he had stopped and people were getting impatient, as he had stopped the movement of the line by suddenly stopping. So, hence, some one pushed him ahead and so Casimir then fell right into this red-headed girl that was talking at the women who was serving food that looked vaguely like rice.

[scarlette]

Scarlette felt another body collide with hers and she turned round, ready to fire a string of insults at the unfortunate person. Yes, she had changed in the past few weeks, but not enough to let this pass. She liked her personal space, anyone who invaded it unauthorized had to be prepared to face the consequences.
She had got as far as "Mind where you're going you freakish freak," when she realised that this wasn't just any obnoxious kid. Casimir was back. Scarlette hesitated for a brief moment, trying to decide how to react. When he had gone she had spent ages being demented, hating every cell in her body and almost everyone around her, then she had come to the point where she'd eventually seen sense and started hating him. That had been fun. Now though, she was normal. And he was just any other person. When she saw his face she didn't feel her insides twist with any great love or hate. He was just some guy she had gone out with for a while.
And to be honest, she didn't really care that much anymore.
"Oh hey Casimir," she exclaimed. "I didn't know you were back yet," she carried on, leaning forward to give him the customary peck on both cheeks.
She spoke in the way she would to any other acquaintance.
"How are you these days? I haven't seen you in ages," Scarlette inquired passively, serving herself from the salad bowl.

[Casimir Japhis]

Casimir blinked. He had not been expecting this calm welcome. No, he had expected her to slap him around the face or for her to storm out dramatically. That was what he deserved after all. He had been turning this conversation around in his head. What would this be like? What was he going to say? He had no idea. He just blinked a couple of and swallowed. He had changed that was sure. He had cut his hair shot and now it wasn’t as long. He had lost weight, making his face seem longer and shallower. Yes, he had defiantly changed. Scarlette though hadn’t. Instead she looked more rugged. He had tortured her mentally, he knew that. He certainly didn’t deserve this serenity from her. No, he wanted to be slapped. To be screamed at. But he knew he wasn’t going to get it. Scarlette wasn’t like that. He knew it. And now he was the fool.

“Scar…,” he whispered as if he was starting a sentence, before he gathered the food he had dropped, picking up the apple. Getting to his feet, he looked back down at the girl whose heart he had broken. He decided though it would be best if he just flowed with the conversation; if she wanted to slap him, he’d take it. He just had to wait.

Tilting his head to one side, her let his long fingers run through his short hair. “I’m alright,” he said stumbling over his words, his voice a soft whisper. “Montreal was great. You should go there one day.” He forced a little, weak smile, his breathing becoming slower. He was going to ask the question which had bugged him for so long. He needed to know the answer. He was desperate.

“What about you though? That’s more important. How are you?”

[scarlette]

He seemed kind of nervous. Scarlette liked him like this. It made him seem more human, when he seemed unsure of what to say and spoke in an uncertain whisper. She started to think that maybe he was acting like this because he cared, because he missed her and wanted her back. But she quickly suppressed this idea. She had moved on. And maybe if she kept telling herself that it would eventually be true. In a casual gesture, Scar pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, letting her gaze drift beyond him for a moment as she feigned distraction.
"Me? Oh, I'm fine. You know, still a bit mental, but that's normal," she replied smiling idly as she moved along the queue. Scarlette had had time to perfect this act, she'd figured it out down to the bemused incline of her eyebrows and gentle jangling of the bracelets round her wrists. Every one of her actions was designed to show him that she was stable now. He had said she would be better off without him, and she was doing her very best to prove him right.
She looked at him with her shining eyes and thought with a surge of spite-"I don't need you anymore."

[Casimir Japhis]

Casimir smiled rather nervously. He was completely disturbed and shaken by her calmness. This wasn't right and Casimir just felt utterly awkward. Shuffling along in the queu, he grabbed an apple. "So, what have you been up to?" he asked, raising an eyebrow, trying to be casual. He knew he was being a fool. A complete fool. She was crushing him and she probably knew it. She always knew. She had changed that was for certain. She was...better. She was less screwed up. Well, what did he expect? He was the one who was screwing her up, so the moment he left, she was obviously going to be normal. Simple mathematics. She was also...changed. She looked different. Casimir really couldn't describe it. It annoyed him. But she had changed and for the better. She was beautiful. That's what Casimir meant to say.

She was beautiful.

[scarlette]

He had suddenly gone quiet, reflective even. Scarlette stopped moving and turned to look at him, tracing the familiar contours of his face. He was still lovable, still damaged. She hated the way those two factors were linked in her mind. She let herself smile momentarily, just remembering how they had been. Both so naïve.
"Not much. You?" she replied, not ready to let the act down yet. She wasn't going to be the first to give in. She had let him see all her emotions too clearly last time. He had known everything about her, everything he felt. She wasn't going to let that happen again.
Scarlette was getting the urge to laugh now, their situation verged on the ridiculous. Here they were, just a few months after he had left her in tatters, yet anyone else would have mistaken them for casual acquaintances. Maybe it would be better if that was all they ever were.

[Casimir Japhis]

Casimir couldn't help but grin rather impishly, allowing a little boyish and playful smile curl on his lips. "Everything," he said quite mischevously. However at the same time, he didn't want to get into details. Really his life was a whole drama but he didn't feel the urge to talk about it. Scarlette was furthermore important. Well at least on his mind. He titled his head to one side and regarded her slightly, like if he were a little puppy and she was a kitten. Or something like that. She truly had changed and it was certainly for the better. At least Casimir had concluded that. Now to move on. "Are you still lost, Scar?" he asked, his expression suddenly becoming rather serious and quite unreadable. He didn't quite know what the question was supposed to mean. But he really wanted to know the answer and he knew Scarlette would be the only person that would give him a good enough answer.

[scarlette]

She could tell by his tone that he wanted to talk seriously now. But Scar wasn't ready for that yet. Small talk was just about all she could cope with right now. Tilting her head she looked at him, feigning confusion. She had always liked acting. And it was even more fun when her audience didn't even realize what she was doing.
"No. I've been in this canteen thousands of times, I think I know where I'm going by now. Although admittedly I can't find the chips. I bet they're hiding them somewhere," she joked light-heartedly, looking around theatrically as if the canteen staff were plotting against her.
But at the same time she knew what he was really getting at, and she was already trying to figure out the answer.
"No Scar, you're different now, remember," a sensible voice in her head warned her.

[Casimir Japhis]

Casimir nodded. "Of course, of course," he whispered faintly, before brushing a loose strand of hair out of his chocolate brown eyes. Turning to look at the apple, he suddenly took a bite. He knew she was trying to change, she was doing her best. Was she acting though or had she really changed? Casimir couldn't tell. Scarlette was always a good actress. He just had to wait and see what fate would bring him.

[scarlette]

When he looked sad like that, Scarlette always felt the pity practically being dragged out of the depths of her heart. It was that dejected attitude, the way he started messing with his hair distractedly, looked away. She liked him best when he didn't meet her eyes.
She watched his pale hands, checking for signs of shaking, any sign to show whether he was still as unstable as they had both been before. "Poor child," she thought, with a fond smile in his direction. Seeing him like this made her wonder whether maybe he did need her after all. He seemed so...distracted.
She reached out a slender hand, loosely wrapping her fingers around his wrist, leading him out of the queue towards a free table.
"Hey," she encouraged him in a soothing voice. "You're home now."
She didn't know why she said it, didn't even know whether it was true. It was just something she wished people would say to her, when she was kind of lost.

[Casimir Japhis]

Casimir was utterly startled. What was he do now? She had taken his hand. She had entered his soul. What was he to do? He was suddenly awake and alive, as if she had woken him up from his sleep. He back in the rule world and he was lost. Lost in it. What was he doing here? Scarlette. Scarlette. That name was so firmiliar. His eyes flickered over to the red-headed girl and the smiled before turning to look away again and allowed her to lead him a free table. A table alone with Scarlette? Was that...allowed? Could he do that?

Sitting down next to her, he bit into his apple and looked back at Scarlette and just remained looking at her for a moment, before looking back down, his gaze suddenly becoming distant. "I'm...I'm.." he began and then got lost on his way. The words lost him. He didn't know what to say. He truly was speechless.

And Casimir was never speechless.

[scarlette]

Scarlette hesitantly let go of the boy's hand. The reluctant gesture was a sign to herself, reminding her not to get too attached. She was resolved not to get back into this. But it was so hard when he sat there, looking so needy, his skin pale and delicate, his eyes distant and confused. She couldn't harden her heart when faced with this. She wasn't however going to dissolve into a pool of liquid sympathy. Physical contact had to be kept at a minimum, and she was on no account going to let herself look at him adoringly. Even if her lips rebelled and broke into a comforting smile, she was determined to keep her eyes neutral. Scarlette wasn't prepared to let anyone back into her soul.
"What's up Cassie? If you need to gush, go ahead. I'm used to emotional breakdowns, what with living in this place," she offered him a chance to tell her what he was going through. Admittedly, she was curious. And it would be fine so long as she managed to stay out of the drama. Famous last words.

[Casimir Japhis]

Casimir returned her smile, yet it could be considered as a far weaker attempt. He was trying though. Truly trying. She wanted to listen to him though. He could see it in her expression and the curiousity was practically shining in her eyes. She really wanted to know. But he didn't want to suffocate her and drown her in his depressing life. He didn't want her to get caught up again in his long tales, depressing attitude and endless drama. And he doubted she was ready for it.

He shook his head and parted his lips as if he was going to say something and then he closed them again, re-thinking. He was about to load her with all his troubles, but he decided against it. For her sake mostly. "You don't want to know, Scar," he simply said, his voice husky, as he turned to look away, his eyes staring out of the window and the darkening sky.