DIFFERENT FORM THE DAY BEFORE,

I AM NOW STANDING RIGHT HERE

I found this journal in my room when I was searching for my hairbrush this morning. I have never been good at things such as this, I never kept a diary growing up, there never seemed to be a point to such writing… Now on the other hand I feel this is the only way to keep me same. My head is spinning and I see no stop to the madness. Everything I believed has been spun and flipped upside down. I should explain myself.

My mother had been after me since I was a little girl to learn martial arts, like she had when she was my age. I had preferred to study piano, enjoying the many sounds of peace and of conflict I could create. Law could only go so far in this world even less far than back home on Earth; if I wished for peace I had to know the Art of War. I may not like it, however it is inevitable. Inevitable… that word again…

Hikaru, my elder sister, once lent me a comic she bought called xxxHOLiC. In the book there was this woman named Yuuko known as the Space-Time Witch. Yeah right like that was really true – a witch controlling Space-Time... Anyway she always kept going on about Hitsuzen, in English it’s her ranting about Inevitability or Necessity and I quote “A naturally foreordained event. A state in which other outcomes are impossible. A result which can only be obtained by a single causality, and other causalities would necessarily create different results.” Basically near as how I can figure, it’s about how there is no such thing as Coincidence, only Inevitability, only Hitsuzen…

Was it pre-determined that I would come to Narnia, come to a place that was outside my element, a place I did not know how to defend myself in? Is the reason I am here to see that even peacemakers must cause some form of conflict to achieve the harmony they desire? I guess I should focus on the here and now and not what destiny or whatever has decided for me. But what’s a Puff to do? I am not cunning like the Slytherins or courageous like the lions of Gryffindor. Ravenclaws are smarter than me I think… my house is for the loyal… but in a situation like this, where war is upon us… I just do not know.

Maybe I should have listened to Okaa-san… maybe mother was right…she always did know best, however that might just be how mothers are. They know everything and are always there to help. I’m missing Hikaru and Yukino… why dad ever agreed to have all his children named in Japanese I will never know… maybe it is because he loves mum so much. Then again we did take his last name, an English one… If I ever get back I’m going to ask him.

CREDIT TO UNWRAPPED ?! OF CAUTION 2.0