The Lost Apprentice, I DEMANDS ATTENTION REAAADDDZ!
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The Lost Apprentice, I DEMANDS ATTENTION REAAADDDZ!| Allera |
Posted: May 8 2009, 08:21 PM
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Your Loving Admin  Group: Admin Posts: 143 Member No.: 1 Joined: 26-March 09  |
Hey dude, had to double-post. =\
Anyway, this is a pretty good story. Plot-wise, there are some questions like: why would Maw single out an apprentice from the Jedi Temple? How did he manage to sneak in there in the first place? Other than her being strong in the Force, why did he choose Kyria? Grammatically, watch out for your punctuation and spelling. Otherwise, it's pretty good. Can't wait to read more. If Kyria does go to the Temple, I'd be really interested to see if she runs into Antiri again. That should be really interesting. Keep going! :) |
 
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| Darth Futuza |
Posted: May 9 2009, 03:58 PM
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Apprentice Group: Global Moderators Posts: 159 Member No.: 9 Joined: 6-April 09 |
Grammar...huh. Maybe I should do a spell check, eh? :D
Almost all those questions will be answered within the next 2-3 chapters... ...only to bring on more. :P |
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| Darth Futuza |
Posted: Jun 20 2009, 12:14 AM
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Apprentice Group: Global Moderators Posts: 159 Member No.: 9 Joined: 6-April 09 |
Just wondering if anybody is still reading this? I've got a few more chapters done, I"ll hopefully get up.
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