Not so far gone, jon

[Lilah Paige]

Lilah hadn't gotten much sleep that night. She didn't sleep a lot in general, but she'd barely gotten three hours. There had been other things to do, not to mention other things to think about. She had stayed in bed long enough to feel like she would get through the day without trouble, before she got up and started to make the breakfast for her masters.

As she did that, before the sun had even started to rise, she started thinking about the pirate that might still in in the stables. Putting a hold on the breakfast that didn't actually need to get made for another hour or so, and she started to pack a few things into a small bag. Bread, and other things that could last for a little while. After the small sack was filled, Lilah scribbled a note onto a piece of paper.

She took the sack and the note to the stables, and carefully opened the door. The sky was still dark, but the sun was begining to rise. People would be waking soon, but the man still appeared to be asleep. He had a good half an hour before he needed to leave, and it was probably better this way. Lilah set the paper down, the sack on top of it, to keep it from floating away.

With that done, she left just as quietly as she'd come in, and went back into the house . The breakfast needed to be cooked before the master woke, he didn't like to wait. It wasn't long before the sun started to rise, and her mind was set fully on the day ahead of her. Not to mention a certain story that she had in her mind with a brand new character to add into the mix.

[Captain Jonathan Ballentine]

Jon finally awoke with the sound of someone leaving the stable. Damn, was he late? Usually his body clock worked well, but he must have been more tired than he had given himself credit for. Expecting to just be forgotten, he stood up from that umcomfortable position in the corner of the stable and brushed the hay off him. His hair was fine, he could feel that, and although the soreness was still there from his tumble, he felt better. He had probably exaggerated most of his symptoms because it was late and he felt a bit irritable anyway.

However, that was when he noticed a sack near him. That definitely wasn’t there when he went to sleep. Carefully opening it, he noticed that Lilah – well, it had to be her – had put together a little picnic for him. Ripping a piece from the bread, he quickly ate it, with a fresh smile on his face. Maybe she hadn’t forgotten him so easily. Or maybe it was a bribe to move faster. Either way, Jon had been on Lilah’s mind that last night, and that was enough for him.

There wasn’t any water in the bag, but that was probably because a container would have had to go missing. The other members of staff would surely notice that, and then Lilah could end up in trouble. He didn’t want that. So, the only alternative to quench his thirst was from the horse’s trough. Nice. It didn’t seem dirty, though, so the captain washed his face in it. Maybe he would just leave a drink until later.

Now, all Jon had to do was check all of his belongings. Right. Sack of stolen goods, check, a second sack of supplies, check… but what was this? A note? Not many servants were literate, so Jon was even more surprised. If you take Marabelle, I’ll hunt you down. He couldn’t help but grin at the thought. He was going to swipe the mare, but… well, he couldn’t now, could he?

He left, then. No point in hanging around, just in case.

----

That evening, Jon returned. His things were all safely hidden away, and he had done a bit of exercise to alleviate the swelling on his back and side. It still hurt, but that was just bruising. It would teach the captain to be more bloody careful in future.

So, what was he doing with another sack? He really didn’t know. Silver pieces were missing from his purse after he had gone to the local butchers and fetched half a chicken. Barbecuing that out on the beach at sunset, he brought wine, bread and dripping. Along with a couple of silver plates and goblets. It wasn’t anything too fancy, he told himself. It was all just to say thank you for the night before. And then he would leave for good.

Now, dressed in black trousers and a bright turquoise silk shirt, black sash tied around his neck to complement the black silk in his hair, the man waited at the stable. If his expectation was right, Lilah would be out to ride very soon.

[Lilah Paige]

Lilah's day went on the way they all tended to go on. She did the usual things that she had to do every day, cleaning and cooking and all of that. Then she did the little jobs that she was given for that particular day, and she had a few moments every not and again to do the things that she wanted to do on her own, without anyone around. The times when she had to eat, or wash up.

Then she had to clean everything up once the master of the house finally took to his room with his wife, and they went to bed. That didn't take too long, as she did a little bit of cleaning all throughout the day, so that it didn't pile up. When the house was quiet, Lilah tended to have different things that she liked to do, from writing to eating a little more, but almost always, riding.

Dressing in her usual riding dress, not fancy, and not what she cleaned in, just an average outfit, she took to the stables, to enjoy her night. She'd already checked during the day to make sure that she hadn't made a mistake in trusting the pirate, and found her favorite horse still in it's stall. That was the one she planned on riding that very night, in fact.

As she pulled open the stable door and walked inside, she was surprised that there was already someone inside. Even more surprised was the face of the person who was trespassing on her masters property. Lilah froze when she saw him there, and looked around after a moment to make sure that it was only him, and he hadn't brought any of his "friends".

"What are you doing here?"

[Captain Jonathan Ballentine]

Out of habit, Jon looked behind him when Lilah quite obviously was checking to see if anyone else was there. He knew that there was no one there, but it still didn’t stop him from looking. Just in case. Giving her a bright smile, the pirate took her in through his eyes. She didn’t deliberately dress up. There was just an ordinary dress there, not some flouncy or dainty thing to impress anyone. Of course, this was when Jon had to remind himself that he was only here for a thank you session, not anything else. After this, he was gone. Totally. Straight into memory.

“I thought I would thank you for last night,” he answered. With that, he turned and started rummaging in his sack, like some kind of twisted Santa Claus. He pulled out the silverware first, and then the wine. “Red. I hope you don’t have too much of a preference,” he joked. Rum wasn’t really the captain’s style. That was just another facet of his personality that he had retained from being in service. Wine was the best general alcohol. Failing that, he enjoyed port, or even whiskey if he was out to deliberately get drunk. The latter was a rare occurrence, of course.

Without another word, he knelt on one knee and produced the chicken, bread and dripping. The first two were each packed in clean linen so they were kept nicely, and the dripping was kept in a medium-sized tin. Like some fake gourmet chef, the pirate grinned up at her before halving each part of the meal, and then dishing it out on the two platters.

“I know you’re probably busy, Miss, but I thought I could do something nice for you. Clear my debt and so forth.” It wasn’t a huge gesture, but it was at least thoughtful. “Care to sit with me?”

[Lilah Paige]

"I told you I didn't need to be paid for it."

She wasn't upset by his offer to try and make it up to her, but at the same time, why was he so desperate to? So far, the only thing that he had in common with a theif and a scoundrel, was the fact that he took things that didn't belong to him. Every other thing that he'd ever said or done seemed to be nothing less that that of a gentleman. Exactl the kind of man that his job wouldn't make one.

Maybe that's what made her not turn him down, although she knew that she was supposed to. After all, this could all have been one big show. Maybe he was after something, maybe ot get something of value in the manor, or something. Lilah wasn't that naive, but you never knew... still, she went along with it any. Call it the curiosity of a woman.

"If you continue to call me 'miss', I'll go back to calling you 'captain'."

She challenged him with a small smirk, before she decided that it might be some fun to join him for his.... meal. It was actually very good looking, all thigns considered. Better than she would have expected, if she'd been expecting that kind of gesture. Taking a seat across from him, in fornt of one of the platters, she picked up her wine and took a sip. It was good.

"All this for a little bandage? It must have cost you a pretty penny."

[Captain Jonathan Ballentine]

“Sorry, M- Lilah. Force of habit,” he explained, sheepishly. After she had taken a sip from the wine, he followed suit. It was better than he had expected. “I don’t get decent company very often. I’m stuck in the middle, you see. Too much of an officer for the pirates, too much of a pirate for the officers. C’est la vie, ma copine.” Jon shrugged. It was the way of the world. Those that didn’t fit in weren’t considered true members of society. It was only on a one-to-one basis that old friends remembered who Jon really was, or the things that he had done for them in the past. It was saddening in a way, but this was the life that Jon had chosen for himself. He wasn’t about to complain.

When Lilah spoke of a pretty penny being spent, he let out a little laugh. “To be honest, I didn’t spend that much. Just on the bread.” With that, he dipped one piece in the cooling dripping before realising exactly how that had sounded. “No! I mean, I only had to pay for the bread, but the rest were gifts.” He could have kicked himself. That sounded plain shifty. Now he felt like he had to explain himself. “I’m old friends with the butcher, so he spared me half a chicken and the day’s dripping. I helped his eldest son into the Navy, so he always gives me little bits and pieces. The wine I had already had saved for a special occasion… but I admit, the plates have only been in my possession for a few weeks.”

Jon felt stupid. After all of this effort to get everything right, he felt like he had just ruined how Lilah would look at him because of his flapping lips. Honestly. “So, tell me. What brings you to work at a manor like this?” It was probably best to deflect away from his own ‘profession’ as much as he possibly could.

[Lilah Paige]

"Too officer for a pirate? I see that from your behavior, but have yet to understand why."

It was something that she'd been wanting to ask him, ever since the night before. There was nothing wrong with the way he acted, in terms of being a man and his way of treating other people. It was a very good and proper way to act. But that was what was wrong with it, in terms of being a pirate. It just didn't seem to fit with the job description... which may have been why he was having so much trouble finding good company.

She gave him a look when he said that he didn't spend that much on the meal, but he was quick enough to cover his tracks, and explain what he'd meant. She just hoped that he was telling the truth, as she'd made it pretty clear that she didn't want any stolen things as payback for what she'd done. Especially whe she hadn't acted in order to get something in return, she'd only done it.... well, she didn't know exactly why.

As he went on explaining, she accepted what he had to say. There was no point in assuming that he was lying. If she wante dot play it that way, there was no point in dining with him at all. Suddenly the tables and turned, and now it was her turn to answer a question about herself. Well, it was only fair, if they were going to have a conversation, and learn about each other, it had to go both ways.

"I've always worked here. Well, since I started working as a child. When my parents died, the Marielle's took me in."

[Captain Jonathan Ballentine]

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Jon smiled, lifting his goblet as if to raise a toast. “Although last night, my manners were barely up to scratch. I apologise.” Now was the time to start letting his charm work, with warm glances and appropriate smiles: everything that he had been taught over the years by the Navy, his parents, friends and girlfriends alike. He was hardly whiter than white, but he was a good man, and never took advantage of a woman that didn’t know what she was doing. Nor had he ever offered marriage in return for… well, what it was the women ended up doing. He was an experienced captain all round.

To hear about the death of her parents, Jon felt sorry for her. His were back in England, thoroughly disgraced by their younger son becoming a pirate. His brother probably thought it was only a matter of time, considering Jon was used to freedom and Daniel to the servitude of his parents. Oh, well, couldn’t be helped. “I’m sorry to hear it,” he said. “But, haven’t you tried something new? Broken out of being a maid? You’re not going to live anyone else’s life but theirs if you carry on here, like this, Lilah.”

Maybe he should be a bit more clear about himself. “I know how it is to break free, and it was the best thing I ever did.” He paused, drinking again, and biting a piece from the chicken. Of course, he chewed politely and swallowed before he continued. “Decent upbringing, ended up in the Royal Navy, rose through the ranks to Captain, and stole my ship. Respectfully, of course. I had saved enough to technically ‘buy’ her, and I left that with the Admiral. He wasn’t pleased. No bloodshed, no shots, nothing. Just the open sea, and a handful of my crew that wanted the freedom that I did.” He laughed. “And I’ve been a pirate ever since. Just looking for a new crew, now…”

[Lilah Paige]

"Why do you assume that the only free life is one on the sea?"

She wasn't saying that she was free, or that she wasn't. Sometimes she honestly didn't know if she was or not, but she didn't like the way he assumed that she was a caged bird, unfulfilled, and almost as if waiting for someone to rescue her. She didn't want or need to be rescued. She didn't want him to think of her like that, like he probably saw all women, weak and only good for what they were often seen for.

"I'm here, because I choose to be. I owe these people much, for all they've done for me."

That was, at leas,t half true. She chose to be here, mostly because, she couldn't think of anywhere else to be, or any good where to get there. So it wasn't completely her choice, but she did beleive that the second part was true. She had been treated well, considered all she didn't have, and she didn't feel that it would be right to simply leave, as if she had no gratitude for what she'd been given.

She wasn't about to start a fight. She wouldn't turn one dow if he were to begin, but she wasn't going to go looking for one. Where she lived and what she did shouldn't have been any concern to this man. She didn't have any doubts that he would forget all about her as soon as the next beautiful girl walked by, and he went abouthis manly was with her, followed by whoever else.

"Navy? That explains a thing or two... what made you leave to live a life of crime?"

[Captain Jonathan Ballentine]

Jon didn’t answer the first question. He heard a slight snap in her tone, and he didn’t want to get her angry. Freedom was a rather subjective idea, anyway. As far as Jon could see it, how could you ever truly be free unless out on the open waves? On land, there was always someone willing to shaft you, and call the authorities. Out on the sea, Jon was the only authority. Being captain, he ruled the ship, and he had handpicked every member of the crew, to make them all trustworthy characters. Generally, anyway. On the sea, he could sail far away, going wherever he felt like. There were no tollbooths on the ocean!

“As long as you’re happy, Lilah.” Jon just smiled. The answer was noncommittal, respecting what she thought to be true. The captain himself would hate to be a servant of any description, and would never be able to understand why she would want to stay in a place like this – out of her own choice. But, if she was genuinely happy, what could he rightly say against her? Why fight it?

Of course, her real question to him was out now, wasn’t it? “A life of crime? Oh, you make piracy sound glamorous.” Chuckling, he then sniffed and gave his answer. “I just wasn’t happy. I was a Captain, I had my ship… but most of the time I had to wait on the docks for orders. And when I was out on the sea with my crew – who I couldn’t entirely choose – I was most likely sent to destroy enemies of the King. “ The smile died down as he looked to the platter in front of him. Jon didn’t like this part. “I am a sailor. I may now even be a pirate, a scoundrel and a thief. I admit, Lilah, I have killed men since I left the Navy, but only in self-defence. When I was a member of the Royal Navy, however, I was an honourable murderer.”

It was horrible. He was given orders to track down pirates or merchant ships that defied the King, and just kill everyone. Each ship had their own crew, though, didn’t they? There was bound to be a few that wanted to be free of all of that piracy, or return home? “All of those crewmembers, those people, had mothers and fathers. Or even children, back on shore. I couldn’t do that any more. Could you?”

[Lilah Paige]

"Thank you."

The way he... not exactly backed down, but at least, stopped pushing his precious ocean on her, it made things easier. She wasn't prepared to fight with him about freedoms and rights, and what she was supposed to be doing with her life. He said that she was alright as long as she was happy... and that was one of the biggest things that she wasn't really able to fight for.

She couldn't honestly say that she was happy. For a long time, she'd wondered what happiness was, exactly, because she had never known it. Some might wonder, if she didn't know what it was, how did she kno wthat she hadn't had it? Well, she had always figured that when she finally experienced real happiness, she would know. Not just a good day, but being truely happy. When it happened, she would know.

Listening to him talk about his past, and the way that he had gone from being part of the navy, to leaving it all behind for a life that most people considered to be for good for nothing men who had ruined their lives, or were on their way to the hangman's noose. But the way that he described how he was currently living on the sea... it really didn't sound like the kind of pirates she often heard of.

"No... That's... that's very noble of you."

She didn't have any kind of a witty comment to give him for his story, all she had was a feeling of awe at his words. She really hadn't known what to expect, but whatever it was, it had certainly not been that. All she had been thinking of since she'd met him was theif and pirate. But the way he talked about his life... he was almost anythig but. He was a sailor, not a scoundrel....

"Lilah was perfectly able to admit when she was wrong, but she actually felt bad about the way she had been thinking about him. She hadn't assumed he was a bad person, she'd actually been thinking about his good qualities... but he was a lot better than she'd originally thought, and that made her feel guilty about the way she'd been looking at him. Assuming, of course, that he wasn't lying. After a moment, Llah took another drink of her wine.

[Captain Jonathan Ballentine]

Who was Jon to chastise the woman for sticking with what she knew? He thought that it was a mistake, mind, to stay here as a lapdog for the rich, but she had to do what she thought was best. He didn’t want to mention that she would probably never be free of them, and die an old maid. Literally and figuratively. Handsome men didn’t appear and fall in love with the maid, they went for the rich daughter. Even if they did love the maid, they would always have to sacrifice their emotions for a stable marriage that would do their families good. The world that they lived in didn’t run on hopes and dreams. Instead, it was supported by duty, and the few people that decided to chase their dreams were announced as pirates and vagabonds. Well, Jon would rather be a pirate than be stuck in a loveless marriage. He knew that it would turn him into someone that he would hated: a womaniser, a drinker most likely, and his children would hate him. Plus, who really wanted to be a pencil pusher at the end of their lives?

“Noble?” Jon laughed. “I’m not noble. But thank you for saying so anyway.” He shook his head. “No, I’m not whiter than white, and I know that I some ways I deserve the noose. I’ve been forced to kill people I would have once had to stand beside, and I’ve found some of the best places to steal from south of the border. Trust me, you would hate South America, but the gold there is fantastic. Money doesn’t make the world go round… but it lets me keep The Dalliance at the peak of her performance, as well as a wage for each of my crew members.”

He smiled, mirroring Lilah as she drank. “I’m sorry. I never have the chance to talk to someone like you… I’m being rather selfish. Come on. Tell me your hopes and dreams… tell me what keeps you up all night, wishing upon the stars… tell me everything!” Now, the captain was getting excited. This was turning out to be more of a dinner date than he had first imagined, but there was something captivating about Lilah that he couldn’t really put his finger on. It would be a terrible waste if this night ever ended.

[Lilah Paige]

"Noble, doesn't mean perfect. The way you talk about the things you do... You're not really a pirate, are you?"

If it sounde dlike an insult to his character, or his profession, she hadn't meant it to be. It was more of a compliment than anything,actually. She didn'tlike the idea of pirates, murdering and taking whatever they wanted with no concience. This man didn't match the description, not in her mind. If he was, than he was a whole new breed of pirate that the world had never seen before.

"Someone like me? What am I like?"

Now she was getting a little confused about what he was thining of. Thre were plenty of people like her. Women, blondes, maids, she wasn't positive what he meant by that. She didn't think she was all that different from other women. Each person had their own quirks, and she wasn't anything special. Her job certainly wasn't, not was her appearence. What did he think he saw in her?

When he asked about her hoped and dreams, a part of her wanted to hop tht h was just kidding, and being sarcsastic about women having dreams. She hated that kind of thinking, but it was common, and it would have been more simple than him actually caring about what she thought. Still, he looked serious, and he'd shared almost his whole life. It was her turn.

"I don't stay up with my own dreams. Just the dreams of others. I write about other people's lives, and their stories, the people I imagine. I stay up for hours thinking about it."

[Captain Jonathan Ballentine]

Jon laughed. “What, you honestly think I’m a Navy man playing games? No, I’m a pirate and proud, Lilah. It may not be in my blood, but… well, a certain Jack Sparrow convinced me that piracy was the only true freedom. I certainly don’t agree with his ideals, but I have to tip my hat to him. I wouldn’t be the man I am today if I hadn’t reached for that wonderful freedom.” Yes, he had happened across Captain Jack Sparrow. Jon had been ordered to capture and imprison the pirate, but it hadn’t exactly worked out that way. Jon couldn’t even really remember what had happened, but he knew that Jack had managed to persuade him to let him go, and even set out on a pirate’s life for himself. For a drunkard and a womaniser, Sparrow certainly talked sense.

“You?” Oh, he hoped that he hadn’t offended the girl. “Well. You’re different. You… you’re not like other women. You’re beautiful, but you don’t flaunt it. You’re well-read, but you almost seem to hide it. You have many good qualities and sell yourself short.” He smiled, looking deeply into her eyes. “And you had the courage to help a man that could have killed you last night. If I had been anyone else, I could have slit your throat, stolen your horse and escaped into the sunset.” He shook his head in wonder at the girl. “You even brought me back here, where I could have killed everyone in the household. And now you’re just sitting, listening to me, and you haven’t judged me like others have. I have to say, Lilah, I respect you for all of that.”

Taking a bite of chicken and bread, Jon then listened woefully to Lilah’s life. How could she just live through other people? “Writing is beautiful,” he lamented. It just wasn’t right for her to waste her life like this. Even if she wrote anything meaningful, then how would she ever be able to publish it, trapped slaving away for people that clearly didn’t care?

He finished his part of the meal. Biting his lip, Jon couldn’t look at Lilah for a moment, thinking about something. Then, he flashed his gaze up, blue eyes wide with possibility. “Come with me. I’ll show you everything, the open sea, true freedom, everything. You deserve better than this, Lilah. Break free – with me.”

[Lilah Paige]

"No pirate like I've ever heard of."

She couldn't look at him and put that word with him, like she would with others. Alright, so he wasn't a saint, and he did fight and kill, but nt like in stories she'd heard, he didn't do it for the sake of doing it. He had.... well, he had a lot that she couldn't say would go along with a heartless criminal. Maybee was just exactlty what the world needed in it's sea people.

Still, he took pride in the title, and she wasn't going to insist that he wasn't something he said he was. She justhad a different idea of what a pirate was, she figured. Mabe the definition was simply a man who lived on the sea with a crew, and they didn't pay for the things they wanted. Most people who did it just happened to be cruel and violent, but this man wasn't.

His description of her charater amost made her blush, but luckily she didn't do that so easily. She couldn't argue with the things that he said, because when she thought about it, he was right. She'd just never taken the time to think about it like that. She didn't spend time thinking about herself when there were more important things to think about. Like her stories. And he was right, it was beautiful. It was the only thing that really made her feel good.

"What?"

That was a big jump form giving in, and letting her live her life, to asking her to go out to sea with him. He wanted to show her everything, and take her along? Was he out of his mind. Sure, he'd mentioned finding crew members, but she'd figured he would havebeen a little more careful with the people he choose. He would do things like check their skills on a ship, for one.

"Jon, I have no experience on a ship, I would be useless to your crew."