Friends

I think this is belongs here....but if anybody feels otherwise, lemme know and I'll move it.

I have a lot of friends, yeah, but are any of them actual friends who need to be there for me?

In all honesty, its easier for me to talk to make online friends, because I can be open to them because they have never met me. I can tell them my problems, and they're always so nice to me =D

In real life though, I still have many friends. But only a few are like my online friends, where I can tell them anything.

I've categorized my friends into three types--- 1)Party 2)Relationship 3)Deep emotional conversations.

1)Party-Yes they're my friends, I talk to them, but I can never tell them my problems because they'd just be like "oh sorry." and thats about it. I have fun with them at school and parties, but if somebody cooler than me comes along, I (and some others) usually get ditched. I don't mind that much because I usually expect it.

2)Relationship- They're my friends who help me out with boys, and they help me vent out my anger on other people. They're really nice, but a little dull. They listen and give advice, but some of them are a little too selfish for me....But I guess that's alright.

3)Deep- I have one friend who I categorize as all three of these, except she doesn't ditch me anytime. I can talk to her about anything, anyone, anytime. She really rocks. =D She's my bestest friend XD

A lot of my friends copy me, I guess, so they usually act like me...It kinda gets annoying.

But anyway...what's your ideas/thoughts on friendship? I easily trust people, but if I'm hurt once or twice, I don't really trust you again after that. I'll still be nice, but I won't rely on you for anything.

Sooooo any thoughts about your friends? [this was kinda pointless, but I needed to get some of this out]

I totally understand what you mean about online friends. It's much easier to talk to a person you've never met in real life, and probably never will. You feel you can be yourself without being judged, and its easier to have more self confidece. And then, I'm also just plain a better writer than talker, but whatever. I too have similar catergories for my friends, though there are few I can truely talk to. I think I have 2 friends I can really, truely, deeply trust with everything. I honestly think I can say these are my only two friends who even come close to knowing the real me.

One thing about friendship though, I have an incredibly hard time trusting people, but once I do, I'm incredibly loyal until that trust is betrayed. Then it takes a long time to earn it back, and in some cases, I can't ever fully trust again.

I'm one of those people who doesn't make friends easily, so I try really hard to keep the ones I have. I'm realy shy in person, though not so when I know you well!

What bothers me is how people treat friendship so lightly at times, you know? How no one believes in strong friendships, or that no one will work hard to keep a friendship alive. Well, okay, maybe not everyone, but I think you understand what I mean. I think nowadays so many people take relationships of any kind for granted, and its just so heartbreaking.

*sigh* meh, maybe I'll have more to say later. Not sure if any of this helped you any ;

I love my friends. I cannot live without my friends. .

I shouldn't categorize my friends because they're all equal, and I feel really bad that I consider people more important than others. For example, my groups of friends are: Friends, Best Friends, and Bestest Friend.

Yeah, I can trust my friends because I can talk to them, and I guess they're kind of similar to Amy-chan's 'Party' friends. There are actually people here who I trust and yeah I can tell my stuff thats personal and heartfelt. But most of the time with these friends we joke around, tease each other and lots of stuff that regular friends would do.

My best friends I love with all my heart. I can talk to them, tell them everything and they can relate, consider and be there for me at times. They can understand, and I can understand them too. Of course, we always do stuff like regular friends do, but my trust with them is very strong, so I guess since we have a strong relationship out trust for each other is strong too. Believe or not, there are alot of people in this category.

Believe it or not, My bestest friend and I don't really tell each other anything. I think we're bestest friends because even though we don't tell each other anything, we just enjoy being silly with each other, having stupid arguements, and actually BEING true bestest friends. (If you're wondering, YES I KNOW BESTEST ISN'T A WORD.) We tell each other stuff from time to time, but we really don't have anything to hide, no issues in life because we're both pretty optimistic about stuff.

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Yes. Me too. I have a friend to who gives friends 'Chances' and the littlest things make you 'lose a chance'. She also controlls my friends relationship with a boy, is very competitive, and an attention wanter. Now, I know I shouldn't be talking bad behind someones back but I guess it's human nature to do this, right? She'll throw a fit over it if you talk bad behind her back. I can remember one time I wouldn't tell her why I was crying and she ran off and cried in the corner because she was so 'worried'.

I think a relationship like this shouldn't be given any chances. I think problems should be taken lightly if you know the person and you only get one chance. You can let loose, have fun, and if you make a mistake maybe they'll forgive you. But if you make a mistake, the problem should be taken lightly. In that case, however, I think her crying was an excuse for me to tell her why I was crying. A true friend can understand if they don't want to tell you something, maybe out of trust or personal reasons, but at times like this they don't need another burden to carry on their back.

Another issue on this is being a biter/jocker/copycat. This annoys me the most because I have a thing with being 'original' and being myself, but theres this person who just wants to BE ME. How I deal with this is asking her to stop copying me and crediting it's her 'thing', but again, she makes a big deal out of it and still calls it her own. I'd like to ask you guys if there is another way to deal with this...? Of if any similar problems, I'd be happy to help out.



EDIT: ZOMFG I love your new set, Atlantie!

I too don't know what I would do without my friends to help me get through my life. I hate to loose any of my pals, and it breaks my heart when we fall apart, even when I'm trying desperately to keep contact, but they just won't make that effort.

I think another thing with your 'bestest' (stealing your word Paladin ) is that you can just be yourself with them. You can act silly and goofy with them because you know they understand, and that they're just as wacky as you are. Heck, I know me and my buddies get pretty silly with each other, and its just something you can't do with just anyone.

Another thing with a good friend is you don't HAVE to talk or explain yourself to them the majority of the time. A good friend knows you well enough to understand that sort of thing.

As for your friend who cried when you wouldn't tell her what was bothering you, Paladin, holy cow. . . man, I have had to deal with one of those before and boy oh boy are they annoying! I think what bothers me most about it is how manipulative they are, and even though you know exactly what they are trying to do, you still can't help but feel guilty for it. And I don't think its wrong of you to rant about it, its perfectly okay! I know I did my share when my friend was doing the same thing!

Now for the copycat. . . I can't say I'v ever had this problem with a friend, but I have with younger cousins who think I'm like the coolest thing and just want to be me. It's hard to get them to stop without hurting their feelings. Is it just your clothing style or interests or everything that she's copying? The best thing I can think of would be encouraging the copycat to find her own style. Like, if you go shopping for cloths together, encourage her to get things that aren't the type of thing you wear, or try and get her to do more things with her own likes. Erg. . .its a hard thing to deal with, I know.

Thankies! I'm glad you like my set Paladin!

My friends have been acting weird latley I haven't talk to them in like one week and when I finally called them back they didn't want to talk to me and then when I called them back after one month they didn't anwser then I called them again and they answered but they were like not wanting to talk I pmed her in CxA and we talked alittle but she was acting weird by her words I could tell again they didn't want to talk They abonded their Board which is very odd she worked very hard on those , I think my Ex Best Friend is talking shit about me again

Sorry if this has nothing to do with what you were asking but I don't feel like reading Xp

Oh, ye of little faith. The worst apocalypse has happened again; ME! NYEH-HEHE! Sorry. I got carried away with one of my pranks from last year.

Alright. Bestest friends first of all! What's a bestest friend? The person that you act all goofy etc. around? I can't say too much because I know that I probably don't have enough friends to have a true "bestest" one. The reason is because I AM goofy all the time; I am probably your definition of *&(^*&*%^& because I have very little empathy with others. However, for me, I'd say finding a bestest friend is the person that you can talk with continuosly and never tire of them. The relationship you have with them can be viewed as close to, or equal to love. Thus, I probably won't have a bestest friend for a while! (always smile, no matter where you are! Otherwise you get sad, and you won't be able to enjoy life, even when you're alone!) And I just repeated everything that everyone else said.

Second, Aerith's stuff...hmm, doesn't look very nice of them. 1) I know "friends" like that. They aren't worth the trouble most of the time. Otherwise, you'll become weird or change dramatically; TRUST ME HERE! Actually, trust yourself, I'm just the counsellor. People like those aren't worth the trouble. If they don't like you for who you are, don't change yourself because of them, just ditch them. And the ex-best friend...well, I've had worse, but still, that can get really annoying...(and I sense another one of my friends is gonna get something similar to yours...) And what's a board? I'm confused. Anyways, this looks like it's old news for you, so I'll let it pass. Send an email if you wish to flame me.

QUOTE (Paladin's Heart)

QUOTE (Atlantie)
What bothers me is how people treat friendship so lightly at times, you know? How no one believes in strong friendships, or that no one will work hard to keep a friendship alive. Well, okay, maybe not everyone, but I think you understand what I mean. I think nowadays so many people take relationships of any kind for granted, and its just so heartbreaking.
.

Yes. Me too. I have a friend to who gives friends 'Chances' and the littlest things make you 'lose a chance'. She also controlls my friends relationship with a boy, is very competitive, and an attention wanter. Now, I know I shouldn't be talking bad behind someones back but I guess it's human nature to do this, right? She'll throw a fit over it if you talk bad behind her back. I can remember one time I wouldn't tell her why I was crying and she ran off and cried in the corner because she was so 'worried'.

I think a relationship like this shouldn't be given any chances. I think problems should be taken lightly if you know the person and you only get one chance. You can let loose, have fun, and if you make a mistake maybe they'll forgive you. But if you make a mistake, the problem should be taken lightly. In that case, however, I think her crying was an excuse for me to tell her why I was crying. A true friend can understand if they don't want to tell you something, maybe out of trust or personal reasons, but at times like this they don't need another burden to carry on their back.

Another issue on this is being a biter/jocker/copycat. This annoys me the most because I have a thing with being 'original' and being myself, but theres this person who just wants to BE ME. How I deal with this is asking her to stop copying me and crediting it's her 'thing', but again, she makes a big deal out of it and still calls it her own. I'd like to ask you guys if there is another way to deal with this...? Of if any similar problems, I'd be happy to help out.

That was a quote. A very long one. I just decided to take a look at this because it seems interesting, and remotely old news by now.

Well, friends shouldn't be given "chances" that's for sure, but mistakes...well, the magnitude of a mistake determines a person's reaction to the mistake. And mistakes make problems; you've said these problems should be taken lightly. I take a different view; if you have problems you sort them out with someone. If the person refuses to see your side of the story then what kind of friend were they? They can't look past their own nose to see what's happening? Or what someone else's story is. I went off topic, but in all seriousness, the problems that a relationship has should be taken seriously, and the mistakes should be confronted, not just forgiven. Otherwise, people will just hold their grudge the whole time and not understand why people do things.

Copycats? Hmm...well, copycats don't respond in situations that they feel uncomfortable with. Usually in public... this doesn't work well with family members, only with annoying copycats you don't like. Once their out of their comfort zone, you'd have to expose them. Yes, be a bitch if you have to; if you have to make them cry, well tough noogies for 'em. It's cold. It's effective. The less effective way, and possibly the less productive, is to sit down and have a long chat, or bring it to a mediator. Usually works well with an authority. But again, I do believe the other method can be more effective, but it takes a lot of balls to do it, and a lot of timing. For example, lull the person into a false sense of security, and then ask them loudly, to catch people's attention. It might work. It might not. It's just a theory, based on random logical thinking.

Has anyone ever had this problem? Where you feel you can never be yourself around anyone in the whole school? It's like I can't tell what is me, what is an illusion or face I front up! It's weird, but I sorta get use to it. It's just hard to explain to others that kinda stuff, and it gets a bit sad when you realise you can't be yourself. PS: I am myself online, and in person I change into a hyper-active wacko!

Friends are people who will always be there for you to their fullest extent. Even though i can be hypocritial on this...

Freind's are fun to have around atleast to me they are but iam a solo man most of the time.....wich is good for me but like i said there good to have around

My freshman year was the first year I've had friends that I can honestly talk to.( I'm going into my sophmore year) So I'm really happy I got them. Made High school much better. But I really also enjoy being alone (finally after ten or 11 years xD)