The Order of the Saikus review topic
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The Order of the Saikus review topic| Letoki |
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 01:03 PM
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The guy who can't think of a member title  Group: Members Posts: 97 Member No.: 175 Joined: 10-May 11  |
Please post all comments and constructive criticism here.
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| Takal |
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 04:15 PM
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Toa of Thunder Group: Forum Administrator Posts: 1,636 Member No.: 11 Joined: 22-July 09 |
Nice work, Letoki. You've certainly got the hang of this quicky. Faster than I did, at any rate. I'll be keeping an eye on this.
However, one small issue I did notice was that the section at the end (so as to prevent spoilers) should be edited so that either the dagger is pluralised or rework those sentences so it doesn't seem like one dagger possibly through three people. |
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| Toa Yurikk |
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 04:48 PM
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Toa of destiny! Group: Members Posts: 693 Member No.: 119 Joined: 10-September 10 |
Very good work. Can't wait to find out what happens next.
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| Letoki |
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 07:04 PM
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The guy who can't think of a member title Group: Members Posts: 97 Member No.: 175 Joined: 10-May 11 |
Oh, yeah, I'll go and fix that. Thank you for the comments! |
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| comicboy15 |
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 07:25 PM
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Toa of Psychics Group: Members Posts: 86 Member No.: 179 Joined: 19-May 11 |
Woah. And I mean woah. This story has so much potential and strong characters and interesting concepts and... woah! This story is seriously boss. It's written exceedingly well for a first time, and I mean that. I like the way that the story seems to be rotating around one thing, but also has a different theme. This is one to watch. And I really mean that. Your story is as good as your comics, that's for sure.
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| Letoki |
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 07:28 PM
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The guy who can't think of a member title Group: Members Posts: 97 Member No.: 175 Joined: 10-May 11 |
Thanks! I'm already starting on chapter 2. |
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| comicboy15 |
Posted: Jun 13 2011, 01:04 PM
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Toa of Psychics Group: Members Posts: 86 Member No.: 179 Joined: 19-May 11 |
Chapter 2 is grrrreat! I like how this story isn't being told in large chunks, but smaller morsels. I also didn't think that the Saikus were matoran. I thought they were some kind of toa/titan breed. But the fact that they can kill toa and still be matoran makes them even more boss.
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| Toa Yurikk |
Posted: Jun 13 2011, 04:46 PM
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Toa of destiny! Group: Members Posts: 693 Member No.: 119 Joined: 10-September 10 |
This story is getting great quickly, keep it up.
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| Letoki |
Posted: Jun 13 2011, 07:01 PM
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The guy who can't think of a member title Group: Members Posts: 97 Member No.: 175 Joined: 10-May 11 |
Yeah, I'm probobly going to write smaller chapters in a shorter amount of time instead of one big chapter in a long amount of time, if you know what I mean. |
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| comicboy15 |
Posted: Jun 13 2011, 10:36 PM
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Toa of Psychics Group: Members Posts: 86 Member No.: 179 Joined: 19-May 11 |
Wi monsieur. It's taken me a while to get back into the grove on my own story, but I did. |
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| Kokua aviatrix |
Posted: Jul 24 2011, 12:40 PM
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Toa Nuva Group: News And Forum Administrator Posts: 1,885 Member No.: 2 Joined: 30-June 09 |
Have throughly enjoyed the first two chapters and definetly looking forward to the rest
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