Enjoy forums? Start your own community for free.
zIFBoards - Free Forum Hosting
Welcome to the Mask Of Destiny Forums. We hope you enjoy your visit.
You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, viewing certain forums, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free.
Join our community!
If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features:

Name:   Password:


 

 The Order of the Saikus review topic
Letoki
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 08:03 AM


The guy who can't think of a member title


Group: Members
Posts: 97
Member No.: 175
Joined: 9-May 11



Please post all comments and constructive criticism here.


--------------------
Must the show go on?
Takal
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 11:15 AM


Toa of Thunder


Group: Moderators
Posts: 1,717
Member No.: 11
Joined: 22-July 09



Nice work, Letoki. You've certainly got the hang of this quicky. Faster than I did, at any rate. I'll be keeping an eye on this.

However, one small issue I did notice was that the section at the end (so as to prevent spoilers) should be edited so that either the dagger is pluralised or rework those sentences so it doesn't seem like one dagger possibly through three people.


--------------------
It's not illegal, it's just cheating.

I'm into exam time right now... I'll be checking up frequently, but I don't expect to be posting in the next two weeks or so unless something really catches my eye.
Toa Yurikk
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 11:48 AM


Toa of destiny!


Group: Members
Posts: 693
Member No.: 119
Joined: 10-September 10



Very good work. Can't wait to find out what happens next.


--------------------
Legend of the Brickonicle infinite build winner!
user posted image
Click to see my self MOC, Toa Yurikk v4
Letoki
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 02:04 PM


The guy who can't think of a member title


Group: Members
Posts: 97
Member No.: 175
Joined: 9-May 11



QUOTE (Takal @ Jun 12 2011, 04:15 PM)
Nice work, Letoki. You've certainly got the hang of this quicky. Faster than I did, at any rate. I'll be keeping an eye on this.

However, one small issue I did notice was that the section at the end (so as to prevent spoilers) should be edited so that either the dagger is pluralised or rework those sentences so it doesn't seem like one dagger possibly through three people.

Oh, yeah, I'll go and fix that.
Thank you for the comments!


--------------------
Must the show go on?
comicboy15
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 02:25 PM


Toa of Psychics


Group: Members
Posts: 86
Member No.: 179
Joined: 19-May 11



Woah. And I mean woah. This story has so much potential and strong characters and interesting concepts and... woah! This story is seriously boss. It's written exceedingly well for a first time, and I mean that. I like the way that the story seems to be rotating around one thing, but also has a different theme. This is one to watch. And I really mean that. Your story is as good as your comics, that's for sure.


--------------------
FIND THE POWER, LIVE THE LEGEND.

user posted image
If you let the flame die, then BIONICLE is over. There is no hope. Keep it burning. Use it as a beacon...
Letoki
Posted: Jun 12 2011, 02:28 PM


The guy who can't think of a member title


Group: Members
Posts: 97
Member No.: 175
Joined: 9-May 11



QUOTE (comicboy15 @ Jun 12 2011, 07:25 PM)
Woah. And I mean woah. This story has so much potential and strong characters and interesting concepts and... woah! This story is seriously boss. It's written exceedingly well for a first time, and I mean that. I like the way that the story seems to be rotating around one thing, but also has a different theme. This is one to watch. And I really mean that. Your story is as good as your comics, that's for sure.

Thanks! I'm already starting on chapter 2.


--------------------
Must the show go on?
comicboy15
Posted: Jun 13 2011, 08:04 AM


Toa of Psychics


Group: Members
Posts: 86
Member No.: 179
Joined: 19-May 11



Chapter 2 is grrrreat! I like how this story isn't being told in large chunks, but smaller morsels. I also didn't think that the Saikus were matoran. I thought they were some kind of toa/titan breed. But the fact that they can kill toa and still be matoran makes them even more boss.


--------------------
FIND THE POWER, LIVE THE LEGEND.

user posted image
If you let the flame die, then BIONICLE is over. There is no hope. Keep it burning. Use it as a beacon...
Toa Yurikk
Posted: Jun 13 2011, 11:46 AM


Toa of destiny!


Group: Members
Posts: 693
Member No.: 119
Joined: 10-September 10



This story is getting great quickly, keep it up.


--------------------
Legend of the Brickonicle infinite build winner!
user posted image
Click to see my self MOC, Toa Yurikk v4
Letoki
Posted: Jun 13 2011, 02:01 PM


The guy who can't think of a member title


Group: Members
Posts: 97
Member No.: 175
Joined: 9-May 11



QUOTE (comicboy15 @ Jun 13 2011, 01:04 PM)
Chapter 2 is grrrreat! I like how this story isn't being told in large chunks, but smaller morsels. I also didn't think that the Saikus were matoran. I thought they were some kind of toa/titan breed. But the fact that they can kill toa and still be matoran makes them even more boss.

Yeah, I'm probobly going to write smaller chapters in a shorter amount of time instead of one big chapter in a long amount of time, if you know what I mean.


--------------------
Must the show go on?
comicboy15
Posted: Jun 13 2011, 05:36 PM


Toa of Psychics


Group: Members
Posts: 86
Member No.: 179
Joined: 19-May 11



QUOTE (Letoki @ Jun 13 2011, 07:01 PM)
QUOTE (comicboy15 @ Jun 13 2011, 01:04 PM)
Chapter 2 is grrrreat! I like how this story isn't being told in large chunks, but smaller morsels. I also didn't think that the Saikus were matoran. I thought they were some kind of toa/titan breed. But the fact that they can kill toa and still be matoran makes them even more boss.

Yeah, I'm probobly going to write smaller chapters in a shorter amount of time instead of one big chapter in a long amount of time, if you know what I mean.

Wi monsieur. It's taken me a while to get back into the grove on my own story, but I did.


--------------------
FIND THE POWER, LIVE THE LEGEND.

user posted image
If you let the flame die, then BIONICLE is over. There is no hope. Keep it burning. Use it as a beacon...
Kokua aviatrix
Posted: Jul 24 2011, 07:40 AM





Group: Moderators
Posts: 1,887
Member No.: 2
Joined: 30-June 09



Have throughly enjoyed the first two chapters and definetly looking forward to the rest smile.gif


--------------------
Insane? Me? How dare you make such an assumption!...whadda mean, eating a entire bag of malteasers in one go is bad for your mental health??
zIFBoards - Free Forum Hosting
Join the millions that use us for their forum communities. Create your own forum today.
Learn More · Register Now




Hosted for free by zIFBoards* (Terms of Use: Updated 2/10/2010) | Powered by Invision Power Board v1.3 Final © 2003 IPS, Inc.
Page creation time: 0.1339 seconds | Archive