Easily put, these are things you should do if you don't want to be horribly mutilated by the community:

1) Don't be a douche. Don't engage in activity related to douchery. Don't take away from my douchery because it's my job to be the overpowered, administrative douche. :)

2) Don't hate. Unless it's merited, then by all means flame the living hell out of anyone who deserves it. Which should be never because Rule #1 dictates that I'm the only one who can be a douche. =D

3) Don't beg for anything. You get what you earn/deserve, and nothing more or less. Custom titles? Earn it. You're obviously not an "oldbie."

4) Keep everything relevant. If it's spam, it obviously belongs in the Spam forum. If it's pr0n related, keep it in the "obviously protected" pr0n & hentai forum. If you're just a general douchebag spamming our boards with enlargement pill ads, we will mock you for several days before deleting your douchery.

5) Feel free to customize your experience. Just don't impede on our ability to do the same. :)

7) Golden Rule: Oldbies are always right. I don't care if they say 1+1=3. Somewhere in that equation, there was a variable you missed. Most likely, it was the + being a douche again. =D

8) Silver Rule: You have a right to say what you want, however you want. We reserve the right to interpret it however we want and kick your ass for it. >:3

10) Title and post count don't matter, and neither does the size of your bra and/or penis. Don't brag out loud and make a douche of yourself because you've posted more spam than the rest of us have collectively collected in our ball sacks.

11) I bet none of you noticed that 6 and 9 were making out in the back. =3 This isn't a rule, just a notation for the unobservant eye. In which case, your foolishness shall be mocked endlessly. <-Not really, but it sounds fun all the same. :)