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Posted: Dec 28 2011, 03:07 AM
The scene opens up as we see Gage moments before his UWF match and Ellie Falsone comes up to him to get his final thoughts on his match at Lethal Brawl.
Ellie: Gage, didn't expect to see you...........
Gage cuts Ellie off as loud Gage chants thunder throughout the arena....
Gage: Ellie, there are more important things right now than me and you catching up. The time is upon us. That favorite time of year where everybody can put aside all the bitching, all the moaning, all the complaining and actually get in the ring and wrestle. Blair Kavisto you know something I realized now why I hated you so much. Because you never shut up about your stupid family. One person says one thing about your son and for the past five years all we have been hearing is "You don't talk my son, or my family....yadi yadi yadi yadi yah. You know you and J.C. Diamond otta start a faction together. Because you two bitches go back and forth between men more than Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush get back together......Blair do us all a favor bitch....and SHUT THE HELL UP!!!!
Adam: Oh wow...
Pete: Here we go....
Gage: Bitch, do you really think that anybody gives a damn about you being in the holiday spirit. Nobody gives a damn about the fact that your mind is going to be in the right place. Nobody gives a damn because you pattern your promos off of the recent twilight book surge. Yeah the bitch has been in a slump, so what........nobody is afraid of your PMS'ing ass in this match. You want somebody to take you seriously bitch, than quit turning every UWF promo you do in an unbearable depressing episode of "Dawson's Creek!"
The fans chant Gage as he loweres the microphone an stares out at the crowd.
Gage: Now on to Joseph Setalia.....Blair i'm going to need your assistance for this one. I'm going to need you to get Joseph's head out of your ass so he can hear what I have to say to him.
Adam: That is wrong?
Pete: Oooh woowww....
Gage: Joseph Setalia before I even entered the brawl, before I even mentioned your name, you made it apparent to have my name in your mouth. So since your use to having stuff in your mouth I'm going to need you to take Blair's basketballs out of your mouth and I am going to need you to grow a set of your own. It's amazing to me that you can get your head out of Blair's ass long enough for you to even cut a promo. Every five seconds all I hear is Blair this, and Blair that.....Blair, Blair, Blair, Blair.....the fact of the matter is Joseph Setalia even if I don't when this match you can expect me to bitch slap the beep* (pu$$y) *beep out of you......
Adam: OH MY GOD!!!!
Pete: No he didn't....
Gage: And to Jermaine Stanton, Randy Stanton, Tito Stanton, Latoya Stanton, and Janet Stanton let me tell the Stanton 5 this. Nobody gives a damn about the fact that you are falling apart. Hell, you have turned the last five years of the UWF into a marathon of Law and Order. Nobody gives a damn about your Legal Problems, nobody gives a damn about the fact that some secret alliance is forming. How cliche. That's all that ever happens. Some son of a bitch runing around here like "Silence of the Lambs" and I can't worry about whether this son of a bitch is going to wrestle, I got to worry about whether this guy is going to eat me alive. How fitting Bo A. Constrictor's name, because I'm going to Bo my size 15 straight up his ass........
Adam: You think he's caught his fire back?
Pete: I'm sure he has...
Gage: Make no mistake about it Lethal Brawl the time for talking has stopped. If I don't win I can guarantee that I make all you son's a bith's life a living hell. Don't call it a comeback, call it a coming of me to whoop your ass. Whoever wins Lethal Brawl, whether it be me or whether it be any of these other Circus rejects aka bad actors, aka as a wrestling fan......WE ARE TIRED OF THE SAME OLD SHIT.........realize that the time for bitching and moaning is over. Realize that shit has just hit the fan.
Gage: Give me this damn mike......
Gage grabs the mike and grabs the cameraman and motions for him to follow him as he makes his way out through the crowd and the crowd errupts.
Gage: This is where it's at. This is where the excitement is. I'm sick of having Stanton Enterprises shoved down my damn throat. I'm sick of Blair Kavisto bitching and moaning about every little damn thing. Hell when she wins she bitches. I'm tired of Joseph Setalia not having a set of balls. I am tired of freaks who think that they are terrorizing the UWF but instead every laughs at there dumbasses.
Gage hops the barricade and climbs in the middle of the ring as he plays to the crowd.
Gage: Everything that you are sick of, I'm sick of as well. How many reincarnations of Stanton Enterprises do we need. How many "surprises" are they goin to give us. I'm sick and tired of five minutes of wrestling and one hour and fifty five minutes Seventh Heaven. I promise the UWF fans, I promise the people at home, and I promise myself.....no bullshit, no smoke and mirrors, Gage Gannon is going to give you the absolute best of himself each and every night.
No more excuses, no more drama, and no more bitchassness.
Gage slams the microphone down as he gets out of the ring and heads to the back...
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