Strange Love

[Alistair Ryder]

Grateful that he'd been given a few days before the show to get what he wanted to do done, he'd come to realize how expensive this all was going to be if he were to continue to buy Lilah stuff to get her attention. And that did seem the way to go about it. So in order not to use up all his savings on flowers, he'd made a rather shady arrangement with the florist to pay for the flowers he acquired from there. The rest of the supplies didn't cost much so those he got by legal means.

Jeremy had told him where they were playing, so Ryder had gotten the flowers and the other supplies needed there before the band arrived to set the stage and last minute practices. Then he'd gone hunting for a willing snack (he'd realized that some people actually wanted to be bitten as long as they weren't killed, because they needed the thrill) before he'd gone home.

Now, however, he was dressed in dark jeans, a black belt, as well as a white t-shirt. Outside of the shirt (which he'd lifted off the merch table so that it read the band's name) he was wearing a black hoodie with a zipper up front and it was a little more than halfway zipped up. He was on his way to attend the show, but he left early enough to be there before the doors opened so that he could give some people access to the front row in return for doing him a slight favor. In fact, he would guarantee them these spots. Maybe some free stuff as well (it wouldn't be free for him, but they didn't need to know that).

And it was on his way to the place downtown, and he wasn't too far from it either, that he ran into his sire. Instead of cursing Dimitri like he would've had any other day before the break-up, he stopped moving and just looked at the man, trying to show the man some respect for once.

"Anything I can do to please you, Dimitri?" His voice was level, and he wasn't being sarcastic or otherwise offensive. If it was one thing he'd learned the last time he'd been alone with his sire it was not to insult the man, because that was a sure way to get beaten up.

"I'm miserable, so please be quick, I have places to be, people to charm."

[Dimitri Eisenberg]

Dimitri had been having a lot of fun these past few days, just terrorizing random humans. He hadn't really killed anyone lately, though. He hadn't really been all that hungry, to be honest. He was feeling a bit peckish tonight, though, so he had gone down to human territory to find some food.

He picked some hooker off a random street corner and led her into a dark alley, acting like he was a regular customer. But then he slammed her against the brick wall and sunk his fangs into her neck, completely draining her. I love it when they scream. When she finally died, he let her body sink to the ground, then he set it on fire to get rid of the evidence.

He quickly put plenty of distance between himself and the now-burning body. When he was far enough away, he slowed down to a human pace. He had heard that there was a really good human band playing nearby, called Something Original. He wanted to hear them, and possibly find someone to fuck in the crowd of fans.

And then he saw his fledgling heading in the same direction. He quickly cut him off with a twisted smile. Ryder looked like he was trying to show respect. That's odd...

"Anything I can do to please you, Dimitri?"

Dimitri stared at the younger vampire suspiciously. His voice had been level; he wasn't being sarcastic and hateful like he usually was. Hmmm... He pondered this fact before Ryder spoke again.

"I'm miserable, so please be quick, I have places to be, people to charm."

Dimitri decided to milk the situation for all it was worth. "Lilah really messed you up, didn't she?" He inquired softly, putting his acting skills to use. "She was totally in the wrong. She should have worked harder to understand you." He shrugged, as if what he was saying wasn't said just to affect Ryder. He wanted to say more, but he didn't want to push it.

[Alistair Ryder]

"I'm miserable, so please be quick, I have places to be, people to charm."

"Lilah really messed you up, didn't she?"

This was not what he'd exptected from Dimitri, but he'd take understanding over abuse any day. Especially from his sire. So he sighed instead of saying anything. It was after all his own fault he was miserable, so he was trying to live with the consequences, but they sucked. He hated it. Therefore he was willing to listen to the other vampire right now without passing judgement at all.

"She was totally in the wrong. She should have worked harder to understand you."

Seemed both Dimitri and himself shrugged around the same time. "I shouldn't've hurt her in the first place, but sometimes she just makes me so angry." But of course he felt that she should've worked harder to understand him. "If she hadn't questioned me in the first place, she wouldn't have gotten herself hurt."

Wait a minute. He was having a heart-to-heart with Dimitri? The world really was fucked up.

"Should I be looking over my shoulder for trouble tonight, or are you just here to do no harm?" He couldn't help but ask, because it was something that really caught his curiosity. It would be the first time he hadn't gotten in trouble with or because of Dimitri if that was the case.

[Dimitri Eisenberg]

"I shouldn't've hurt her in the first place, but sometimes she just makes me so angry. If she hadn't questioned me in the first place, she wouldn't have gotten herself hurt."

Dimitri nodded. "See what I mean? It was her own fault; she shouldn't have pushed you. She should have trusted you."

"Should I be looking over my shoulder for trouble tonight, or are you just here to do no harm?"

He couldn't help it; he laughed. "I just ate, Ryder, I'm not here to cause trouble. I was just wandering away from her corpse, really," he bluntly stated. Murder was no big deal to him, he did it all the time and got a kick out of it.

He almost 'apologized' for beating his fledgeling up, but then he thought that if he did that, Ryder would surely see through his ruse. So he kept his mouth shut on the subject.

"What brings you out here?"

[Alistair Ryder]

"See what I mean? It was her own fault; she shouldn't have pushed you. She should have trusted you."

Where did all this come from? Where did all the understanding and gentleness come from? Dimitri had never struck him as the type to have heart-to-hearts with people, yet here he was. Of course it could all be a lie, but it still made the younger vampire feel better about the situation. And about feeling hurt because of it.

"Should I be looking over my shoulder for trouble tonight, or are you just here to do no harm?"

"I just ate, Ryder, I'm not here to cause trouble. I was just wandering away from her corpse, really."

He was amused. Why was it amusing that this man had just murdered someone? Because it was something he could relate to.

If Lilah had heard Dimtiri talk about murder, she wouldn't have been so quick to judge him, he thought. He was gonna stop worrying about what she was gonna think, damn it she left him. Normally he'd be on someone else long before now anywa, what was the big deal? What was so special about this one girl that he couldn't let her go?

She'd gotten him to talk, that was what.

"What brings you out here?"

Now he had to smile a little. There was no way he was gonna tell Dimitri about his plan to get Lilah's attention, but he could tell his sire where he was going.

"Nothing troublesome. Going to listen to my friends play, from the crowd instead of playing with them." He didn't think he needed to say that Lilah wouldn't accept him playing with them, if Dimitri knew he was in a band with his friends, he'd figure that much out.

"Ex-friends don't make good band mates..." he was again thinking of Lilah, but she had been a friend before he'd loved her and now she wasn't even that. Yet.

"Anyways... I'm glad you, erm, brought Lilah home the other night and for not hurting her more than she alread was, because she'd have gotten herself mangled by a werewolf on the way for sure, even though it's such a short walk." That girl was trouble. She attracted trouble where no one else could.

Wait a minute. He was thanking Dimitri for something he'd done. Dimitri was being all nice. Something wasn't quite right with that, but he couldn't figure out exactly what.

[Dimitri Eisenberg]

"Nothing troublesome. Going to listen to my friends play, from the crowd instead of playing with them. Ex-friends don't make good band mates..."

"So not only is Lilah not letting you play with your own band, but she's turned all your friends against you?" He made a tutting, disapproving noise. He was doing a good job, pinning all the blame on Lilah when he knew it was Ryder's fault she was gone from his life.

"Anyways... I'm glad you, erm, brought Lilah home the other night and for not hurting her more than she already was, because she'd have gotten herself mangled by a werewolf on the way for sure, even though it's such a short walk."

He was sure he wouldn't be thanking him if he knew what he was up to, or that he had kissed the girl. "Hey, I'm your sire, I'm supposed to look out for you and yours, even if I haven't really been doing that. But then again, she isn't yours anymore, is she?"

Then, for shock value (also because he figured they were going to the same place), he asked, "Why don't I go with you to the concert?" And for once, he wouldn't mind or care if he was denied.

[Alistair Ryder]

"So not only is Lilah not letting you play with your own band, but she's turned all your friends against you?"

Dimitri had gotten it all wrong, but he didn't care to correct him right now. His sire didn't need every truth there was and maybe he'd feel more inclinded to help if he thought the humans had disowned him. Maybe he'd even leave the guys alone that way.

"Anyways... I'm glad you, erm, brought Lilah home the other night and for not hurting her more than she already was, because she'd have gotten herself mangled by a werewolf on the way for sure, even though it's such a short walk."

If he'd expected anything from Dimitri after this little speech, it wasn't that the older vamp would be so understanding.

"Hey, I'm your sire, I'm supposed to look out for you and yours, even if I haven't really been doing that. But then again, she isn't yours anymore, is she?"

"She's not mine, but she's not entirely free to go before I say she is either." Fuck. What was with the possessiveness. The redhead hated when people tried to control her life, and he wasn't trying to, he just didn't want her to move on without making at least another effort and part as friends.

"Why don't I go with you to the concert?"

If anything, this offer surprised him and he became a little suspicious, but then again hadn't Dimitri promised not to cause problems?

"I see no problem with that," he responded, surprising himself furthermore.

Of course, he picked up his phone and texted Jeremy before they moved anywhere.

Giving you the heads up, D's coming. Promised not to cause problems.

Be careful, I think he's up to something.

"We better get going though, because I have some things to take care of before they open the doors, and we better not be seen."

So they went to the doors, and he elegantly got his things and to the front of the line, handing out about two dozen roses, before letting the people accepting his request in first so they would be in the front. Of course he didn't care what Dimitri thought of the whole thing, as he let 50 random people in before anyone else, with the roses and posters, ordered to wait for the signal from the drummer to throw the roses and hold up the posters.

"Ready?" he asked Dimitri before he walked in, making sure he was well hidden in the crowd. He hoped his sire liked the show, because for some reason he really wanted someone to approve of something he did for once.

[Jeremy]

Jeremy still couldn't get Lilah to talk. He and Luke had tried practically everything. Even the replacement they found, a girl named Carrie, couldn't get her to talk, and Carrie was outgoing, friendly, and seemed to be able to cheer anyone up. Well, anyone except Lilah, that is. The good thing about Carrie is that she knew all of the songs, especially the ones Lilah sang (she wouldn't be doing any of those tonight, though, not if she wouldn't even speak), and she was a fantastic bassist.

They were halfway through the show when Jeremy gave the signal. Dozens of white roses were thrown on stage at that moment, leaving Lilah (who was smart enough to know they were for her) absolutely bewildered. The redhead continued playing, however, bravely pressing on. He couldn't see her face, but she seemed upset and unhappy about it. Jeremy wondered why it would upset her.

They finished the show, and the posters with Forgive me, Lilah were thrown up. Jeremy watched in shock as Lilah took the mic from Luke, who looked as surprised as he and Carrie were. She was going to speak. Maybe forgive Ryder, hopefully?

[Lilah Wilkins]

Lilah would never tell anyone, but she had kept the white flower and the note Ryder had sent her. What was she supposed to do, burn them? She couldn't, she still loved him, even though she wanted to hate him. He had killed his father and then abused her, she didn't want to love someone like that. He had easily lied to his own mother, she didn't want to love him. But she did, and nothing would ever change that.

They had gotten a replacement bassist to take Ryder's place. She was a very friendly and nice girl, Carrie was. She even tried to talk and hang out with Lilah, but... Lilah wasn't ready to talk. She didn't trust her voice, she didn't trust that she wouldn't break down and cry if she uttered anything.

They were all playing well at the show. Lilah was, of course, on Seth's guitar. But halfway through the show, tons of white roses, like the one Ryder had left her, were thrown on stage at her. She was shocked. She didn't lose her composure, though, she kept playing. She couldn't ruin the show just because she was surprised.

But how dare he try to win her back? It all hurt too much. He had gotten their fans involved. She swallowed thickly and considered stepping up to the mic to tell him to leave her alone, but she didn't want to talk to him. She knew he was out there, too. He would stay to see her reaction.

When they finished the concert, posters were held up, spelling out Forgive me, Lilah. She couldn't believe it. She was so upset with him, and she didn't want to forgive, she didn't want to love him. Didn't he know how hard he was making it for her to move on? Or was that his whole purpose?

She let Seth's (no, her) guitar hang loosely from her shoulder as she stepped towards Luke and gingerly took the mic from him. She ignored his surprised look.

"Alistair Ryder," She began in a broken voice, "I know you're out there. I have three words for you. Go to hell." She gave the mic back to Luke, unplugged her guitar, and walked backstage, away from the shocked and prying silence of the crowd. She couldn't handle it.

As soon as she was alone and far enough away that no one would hear her, she broke down crying.

[Alistair Ryder]

It pleased him that his friends had found a more than capable replacement, and that she seemed to fit in well considering she'd only been there a few practices.

When the roses where thrown on the stage, she was shocked, he could tell, but he was glad she kept on playing. It wasn't until the end of the concert when the posters were held up that he got a proper reaction from her, though she didn't say anything nice at all. Not that he'd really expected it, he was just trying to get a reaction for now.

"Alistair Ryder, I know you're out there. I have three words for you. Go to hell."

She was so hurt. But at least she'd talked to him, indirectly. That was better than her just ignoring everything all together. It didn't even matter that the crowd was shocked to silence, because they didn't notice him, no one had paid much attention when he'd gotten them to help, not for any longer than it had taken them to get to the front, surprised at their own luck.

Instead of creating a scene, he just shrugged. "Oh well, worth a shot," he hadn't noticed that Dimitri was still around, in fact he'd forgotten all about it for a little while. Now he forgot all about being stealthy as well and was looking up at Jeremy and Luke, feeling at loss for what to do now.

Her crying reached him through the silent crowd milling out the doors, though he doubted anyone else would hear her. Well, maybe his sire, but no one human, not yet. He hadn't meant for her to be sad and it made him really angry again, so instead of having a word with Jeremy as he'd planned, he marched out of there, pushing his way through the crowd, wanting to hurt someone. More precisely himself.

[Dimitri Eisenberg]

Dimitri smiled when Lilah told Ryder to go to hell in the most hurt voice he had ever heard. He loved it when people were miserable. Faintly, through the silence of the disbursing crowd, he heard the unmistakable, sweet, sweet sound of miserable sobbing. Ah, so Lilah was crying over the situation. She was probably trying and failing to move on.

Well, if she couldn't move on, then she'd be forced to take abuse from the boy she was in love with, right? He was just looking out for his fledgeling, who, as a vampire, should be allowed to do whatever he wanted to the human girl.

Ryder was storming off, obviously angry. I could use his anger to my advantage and control him with that fury. Forcing himself not to smile, he followed Ryder and stopped him from getting too far. "She was out of line," he started, trying to make Ryder angry at Lilah, "After all that work you put in to get her attention, and all she can do is tell you to go to hell? You know she deserves to be miserable, she shouldn't be treating you like this."

[Alistair Ryder]

"She was out of line."

He snarled, not at all happy with being stopped from just getting the hell away from that place. Fuck her, she wasn't worth all the trouble. Wasn't worth trying to be something he was not or trying to fit in with his human family anymore or friends. If he wanted to feed on humans, then that was his fucking business, not hers.

"After all that work you put in to get her attention, and all she can do is tell you to go to hell? You know she deserves to be miserable, she shouldn't be treating you like this."

Ryder wasn't really mad Dimitri, and he was sure his sire knew that, but he needed to stop being miserable, and the best way was to stop holding back how angry he was with everything. "She can go fuck herself, or go to hell for all I care. I've had it." He wasn't sure if he meant it or not anymore. In the beginning, it had been a lie because clearly he didn't want to let her go. Now he wasn't so sure if she was going to keep ignoring him and make him writhe with new hurt.

"She's human, weak, pathetic and close-minded and I don't want to fucking love her anymore." He would've yelled that last part out loud if it had only been him and Dimitri there, but as it was, he was keeping his voice down, frustration and anger very much present in his entire character, earning him a few curious glances from the people passing by on their way home.

[Dimitri Eisenberg]

"She can go fuck herself, or go to hell for all I care. I've had it."

Dimitri couldn't hold back the feral grin. With Lilah out of the picture, Ryder would stop stooping to human levels. He would be easier to control, easier to feed hatred, anger, and violence into. But if he went back to wanting Lilah, he'd have to realize that he should just take her and do whatever he wanted to her, to force her to accept him and submit to him. She was just a human, after all. A cute, tasty one, but still just a human.

"She's human, weak, pathetic and close-minded and I don't want to fucking love her anymore."

"Now you're getting it," Dimitri praised, "Humans are weak and inferior. We can do whatever we want to them. Anyway, I'll see you later." With that, he left, proud of himself and certain that he'd severely swayed Ryder's opinion of humanity.

[Lilah Wilkins]

Her bandmates finally found her. Lilah forced herself to stop crying. As she wiped away her tears, she noticed Jeremy send Carrie and Luke a pointed look. Luke just stood there like an idiot, but Carrie understood and dragged Luke off.

"Lilah? I'm here for you. You should talk to me, tell me why you're crying."

She relented. "I-I just... It hurts s-so much..." She forced herself to say. It was hard, she had just sobbed her heart out. But she continued. "I'm still in love with him, that's why it hurts so much that he's trying to win me back. I d-don't want to love him, but I do. He's making it so hard to get over him."

"Hey, everything'll be okay in the end, alright?"

"Why can't I stop loving him?" She bemoaned, absolutely miserable.

"What exactly did he do to you, to make you so upset?"

"Nothing, we just had a fight is all. A big one. Nothing else really happened," she lied, still defending Ryder and hiding the truth from Jeremy. She knew he knew she was lying, but he wasn't pushing it. She was grateful to him for that.

[Alistair Ryder]

"She's human, weak, pathetic and close-minded and I don't want to fucking love her anymore."

To his great surprise, Dimitri praised him, and that should've made the alarm go off, made him realize that his mentor was up to no good, but it didn't. He was just too worked up. Past the point of caring, and about to just grab one of the lingering fans just to kill something to make himself feel better, but he wasn't there to cause trouble. Not more than he already had that night.

"Now you're getting it. Humans are weak and inferior. We can do whatever we want to them. Anyway, I'll see you later."

When his sire left, Alistair stared after him a while before he heard Jeremy's voice from far away, talking to Lilah. Of course he got curious and used all the stealth he could muster at his current temper and moved closer so he could listen better. And why did he do this? Because he wanted to know for sure that she meant what she'd said. Not that he really cared anymore, he was so over that bitch.

"Lilah? I'm here for you. You should talk to me, tell me why you're crying."

"I-I just... It hurts s-so much..."

Wake up girl, you're not alone.

Oh how she was pissing him off all over again. And that made him bite the inside of his cheek not to yell at her as if they were in the same room, because he knew deep down that this was his own fault. He couldn't go there and shake some sense into her either.

"I'm still in love with him, that's why it hurts so much that he's trying to win me back. I d-don't want to love him, but I do. He's making it so hard to get over him."

So neither of them wanted to be in love with the other, that was just great, maybe they could fall out of love then and at least be able to look at each other again and play together? She's not worth it, I wish she'd choke on her own misery, that way one of us would be free at least. It wouldn't be like nothing ever happened, but he would get the only thing he'd wanted to keep from his human life back: his music. And Jeremy and Luke as friends still. He still thought she could go to hell.

"Hey, everything'll be okay in the end, alright?"

"Why can't I stop loving him?"

"What exactly did he do to you, to make you so upset?"

If he'd needed the air, he would've held his breath. This was a big one: was she going to keep his secret? This was a test of her character. Turned out she was noble, for a petty human girl.

"Nothing, we just had a fight is all. A big one. Nothing else really happened."

Fuck her. Why did she have to defend him and be miserable at the same time? And if he didn't care about what happened to her, why was he touched by this gesture?

Out of pure frustration, he lashed out at the wall with his left hand, hard as he could. He cursed himself for wincing when he tried to straighten out his fingers again. He'd have to fix it when he came home or on the way there, because he didn't want anyone to notice him there, because surely he hadn't been very quiet when he'd yelled angrily at the wall before hitting it with all his might, really hurting his hand (though he didn't seem to have broken anything luckily).

With a last look towards the concert place, he started to walk away, pulling his hood over his head.